One of the most dangerous fads about the food we eat is that unpasteurized milk is more healthful than pasteurized milk. Some people believe that pasteurization removes certain nutrients from the milk. I don’t know any other arguments in favor of raw milk, but I grew up on a farm, and I know what goes into the milk bucket besides milk when you milk a cow by hand.
Cows are evil animals, and they like to put their hoofs into your bucket of milk. Their hoofs are typically covered with manure, as are their tails, which swing to and fro above the bucket. So we strained our milk and sent it to the creamery, where the workers got rid of the small particles of manure and its diseases by pasteurizing it. We then used part of the money we got paid for our milk and bought pasteurized milk for our own consumption.
Nowadays, dairy farmers use milking machines that make it impossible for a cow to put her hoof into the milk. The farmers wash each cow’s teats before attaching the machine, but cows don’t sleep on clean sheets every night, so the dairy farmer can’t always get the teats perfectly clean. The milk truck comes around every day, collects the milk, and takes it to the creamery for pasteurization.
But for reasons unknown to your aging farm boy, some people want unpasteurized milk. Because dairy farmers use milking machines, they’re somewhat unlikely to get manure in their milk, and some people buy raw milk from dairy farmers willing to sell it to them. What’s left to worry about? I’ll tell you what’s left.
Tuberculosis. That’s what. Louis Pasteur didn’t go to a great deal of trouble just to invent a better milkshake.
Some diseases that kill animals can also kill humans. Tuberculosis is one of those diseases. Some animals can transmit their diseases to humans. Cows can transfer their tuberculosis to humans. How? Drink a nice cold glass of raw milk from a cow that has tuberculosis, and you can have tuberculosis, too. Or you can drink pasteurized milk from that cow until it dies, and you’ll never get that cow’s tuberculosis.
In Iowa, the state where I live, specialists from the Department of Agriculture routinely test all milk cows for tuberculosis, but it’s impossible to destroy all the tuberculosis microorganisms in every milk cow in Iowa. This is also true for all the other milk cows anywhere in the world.
In Iowa and throughout the United States, as a matter of law, grocery stores may sell only pasteurized milk. During a recent visit to the local Hy-Vee Food Store, I counted seven brands of milk, all of which said “Pasteurized” on the labels. These seven brands included Lactaid, Land O’ Lakes, Anderson Erickson, Hy-Vee, Roberts, Organic Valley (”Ultra Pasteurized”), and Country Fare.
I explained all the arguments in favor of pasteurized milk to a friend many decades ago, but she ignored me. One day I happened to drop by her house just when she was bringing in the groceries. I sat on a kitchen chair while my friend’s gallon of milk sat on the counter beside the refrigerator. The woman put groceries here and there and finally turned toward the milk. She peered at the gallon of whiteness for a few seconds. “What’s that on the jar?” she said.
“That?” I said with my innocent farm-boy voice. “That’s cow manure.”
My friend stopped drinking raw milk.
Saturday, December 30, 2006
Blogsvertise
Blogsvertise offers bloggers a way to make money while blogging. All you need to get started is an active blog that is already up and running. You also need an established PayPal account because that’s the only way that Blogsvertise can pay you. Once you’ve met these two requirements, go to http://www.blogsvertise.com/ and complete the simple online application.
Assuming that Blogsvertise accepts you into its program, the administrator will send you an existing URL for an advertiser, and you must complete a post in which you repeat the URL three times. Your post must be at least 50-60 words in length. You don’t have to praise the advertiser’s website, products, or services. You simply say whatever you want and remember to include the URL three times. (Naturally, you have to avoid foul language or pornographic themes.) Simply write about the website in whatever way it relates to you. You can even complain about the website, but I wouldn’t advise an endless string of complaints.
After posting your comments, you notify the Blogsvertise administrator for approval. If approved, you receive an agreed-on amount to your PayPal account. Not bad for only 50-60 words.
If this appeals to you, give it a try. You have nothing to lose but money.
Assuming that Blogsvertise accepts you into its program, the administrator will send you an existing URL for an advertiser, and you must complete a post in which you repeat the URL three times. Your post must be at least 50-60 words in length. You don’t have to praise the advertiser’s website, products, or services. You simply say whatever you want and remember to include the URL three times. (Naturally, you have to avoid foul language or pornographic themes.) Simply write about the website in whatever way it relates to you. You can even complain about the website, but I wouldn’t advise an endless string of complaints.
After posting your comments, you notify the Blogsvertise administrator for approval. If approved, you receive an agreed-on amount to your PayPal account. Not bad for only 50-60 words.
If this appeals to you, give it a try. You have nothing to lose but money.
Friday, December 29, 2006
Tickets
If you enjoy horse racing as much as I do, and if you hope to attend the Kentucky Derby next spring, the last thing you want is to learn that the event is already sold out. The only thing that comes close to that disappointment is to obtain tickets, then arrive for the race and learn that you have the worst seats at Churchill Downs. A bad seat can be almost as annoying as no seat.
Next time, order your Event Tickets through Premium Seats USA. Premium Seats USA provides first-class tickets for concert, theater, and sports events throughout the country. If horse racing doesn’t appeal to you, perhaps you need tickets to a performance of Les Miserables. Regardless of your preference, Premium Seats USA has a huge supply of tickets available.
So relax and enjoy yourself. Maybe I’ll see you at the races.
Next time, order your Event Tickets through Premium Seats USA. Premium Seats USA provides first-class tickets for concert, theater, and sports events throughout the country. If horse racing doesn’t appeal to you, perhaps you need tickets to a performance of Les Miserables. Regardless of your preference, Premium Seats USA has a huge supply of tickets available.
So relax and enjoy yourself. Maybe I’ll see you at the races.
Chinatown
Chinatown is the only motion picture made in color that deserves to be included in my list of the nine greatest film noir movies ever made. Color, by definition, is the opposite of film noir. But Director Roman Polanski and his camera crew muted the color in ways that make you forget that the color is even there. Chinatown recreates the criminal career of William Mulholland, whose manipulation of water rights made Los Angeles possible and will one day destroy it. When the snowfall in the mountains drops to one pint per acre, I don't know where the bloated population of southern California will find its next drink. As always, buy this film at Patrick's Film Noir Store.
Blog Explosion
Every now and then I wander into Blog Explosion. I always head straight for the Books/Lit/Writing group in hopes of finding some good prose.
Almost always.
About two hours ago, I stumbled and fell into the politics group, although I didn’t notice the error until I started reading the second blog. At that point, a repetitiveness in the writing style and content hit me in the forehead like a paper weight thrown by a frustrated journalist.
In the politics club, all the contributors have opinions, and their opinions tend to veer toward the extreme. Statements resemble bayonet charges rather that discourse. The writers suggest by their tone and content that they wouldn’t mind executing anyone who disagrees with them. Instead of rigging elections, they’d prefer to eliminate the electorate.
The violence of the opinions expressed by the political contributors is matched only by the foulness of their language. If you have young children around the house, I suggest that you steer them away from the poolroom language of the political commentators. Vulgarities and obscenities fly around the page like a powerful break by Minnesota Fats. This crowd of politicos didn’t pay much attention to the nuns while in grade school. Maybe they didn’t get into grade school.
All this violence sent me running for the Books/Lit/Writing group where I belong. We may not be as talented as Flannery O’Connor, but most of us want to limit the body count.
I lost my cue stick. See you in the library.
Almost always.
About two hours ago, I stumbled and fell into the politics group, although I didn’t notice the error until I started reading the second blog. At that point, a repetitiveness in the writing style and content hit me in the forehead like a paper weight thrown by a frustrated journalist.
In the politics club, all the contributors have opinions, and their opinions tend to veer toward the extreme. Statements resemble bayonet charges rather that discourse. The writers suggest by their tone and content that they wouldn’t mind executing anyone who disagrees with them. Instead of rigging elections, they’d prefer to eliminate the electorate.
The violence of the opinions expressed by the political contributors is matched only by the foulness of their language. If you have young children around the house, I suggest that you steer them away from the poolroom language of the political commentators. Vulgarities and obscenities fly around the page like a powerful break by Minnesota Fats. This crowd of politicos didn’t pay much attention to the nuns while in grade school. Maybe they didn’t get into grade school.
All this violence sent me running for the Books/Lit/Writing group where I belong. We may not be as talented as Flannery O’Connor, but most of us want to limit the body count.
I lost my cue stick. See you in the library.
Software Systems To Improve Your Business or Organization
Acorn Systems provides the IT value management software needed to help its customers increase profits and reduce costs. Whether you are associated with a multi-national corporation, a governmental organization, or a medium-sized business, Acorn Systems has the consulting capability and the software platform to improve your profits. Acorn uses its information technology value management software to help you reach your performance management objectives by giving you the ability to make wise business decisions.
Acorn Systems can help your business or organization because every employee at Acorn focuses on helping customers improve profits and reduce costs. This is Acorn’s only business. It has the consulting methodology, and it has the value management software that will interface with your existing software systems. Taken together, these ingredients will quickly increase the success of your business or organization.
Acorn Systems can help your business or organization because every employee at Acorn focuses on helping customers improve profits and reduce costs. This is Acorn’s only business. It has the consulting methodology, and it has the value management software that will interface with your existing software systems. Taken together, these ingredients will quickly increase the success of your business or organization.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
The Blue Gardenia
Director Fritz Lang turned an actual crime into this 1953 film noir classic. Many fans have reservations about this movie, but it makes my list of the best film noir thrillers ever made. Ann Baxter stars as an accused killer with a bad memory. Raymond Burr portrays a worthless man who suddenly becomes a corpse. And Richard Conte plays the journalist who first condemns and then defends the accused woman. Be sure to make your purchase through PATRICK'S FILM NOIR STORE.
Wednesday, December 27, 2006
Hayfield Dental Care
I make a habit of taking good care of my teeth. I brush and floss every day, and I avoid sweets and other foods that contain too much sugar. But despite all these heroics, the day always arrives when my dentist tells me that this or that tooth needs restoration. Although my dentist and his excellent dental assistant are among the kindest people in the world, I always arrive for the appointment filled with dread. And every time, I leave the office wondering why I had been so fearful. My dentist always does his work with the least amount of discomfort to me.
If I lived in or near Alexandria, Virginia, I would look for a dentist like the one I have now, and I’d start looking at Hayfield Dental Care. Hayfield Dental Care has been open since 1987, and its dentists have treated over 23,000 patients since that date. All these dentist have received the advanced training needed to carry out almost any dental task required, without having to refer patients to another dental office.
The dentists at Hayfield Dental Care use only the newest and most advanced materials and equipment available. They provide general, family, and cosmetic dental care. A dentist who specializes in orthodontics provides full-time service. The Virginia Board of Dentistry reports that it has never received a complaint about any dentist at Hayfield Dental Care. You can contact Hayfield Dental Care at 703-971-2220.
If I lived in or near Alexandria, Virginia, I would look for a dentist like the one I have now, and I’d start looking at Hayfield Dental Care. Hayfield Dental Care has been open since 1987, and its dentists have treated over 23,000 patients since that date. All these dentist have received the advanced training needed to carry out almost any dental task required, without having to refer patients to another dental office.
The dentists at Hayfield Dental Care use only the newest and most advanced materials and equipment available. They provide general, family, and cosmetic dental care. A dentist who specializes in orthodontics provides full-time service. The Virginia Board of Dentistry reports that it has never received a complaint about any dentist at Hayfield Dental Care. You can contact Hayfield Dental Care at 703-971-2220.
The Hard-Boiled Detective
For many readers of mysteries, the hard-boiled detective remains the most popular hero in detective fiction. Some of us like the genre so much that we've joined the club by writting about our own hard-boiled detectives. Check out the sample below:
Tim Dolan came out the door of the Sheep’s Head Tap, turned right, and walked down West Fourth Street. It was one of those mild spring evenings that convinces even the most skeptical Midwesterner that winter is finally over. The smell of plowed earth blew in from the west, the breeze tousling Dolan’s sandy hair. A young woman came down the sidewalk, pushing a stroller in which a baby was happily chewing his fist.
Dolan was a tall, slender man with long legs and a graceful stride. A walk always made him feel good, and tonight he felt pretty good already. He had consumed just enough Harp Lager to make him pleasantly drunk, but not enough to cause a hangover the next morning. Long experience at the Sheep’s Head had taught him how to avoid the ordeal of going to work with a hangover. He walked down Fourth Street, past Lafayette Square, to a block of row houses. When he reached the second house, he turned and climbed the worn limestone steps.
The door was unlocked. Dolan walked inside and closed it behind him. A dim ceiling light burned in the entryway. Straight ahead on the left, carpeted stairs and a walnut banister led up to the second floor. To the right, French doors led to the living room. Dolan hummed a popular tune as he opened the door and walked in.
Along the opposite wall, a floor lamp burned beside an oak table. Dolan stopped just inside the door. Something was wrong here. He started to walk over to the table, then saw something in his periphery, something coming toward him. Fast.
Suddenly on guard, he turned in that direction, but too late. The beer had slowed his reaction time. A heavy object struck his head with terrible force. He raised his hands to protect himself while struggling to stay on his feet. The object hit him again, even harder this time. He staggered to one side and felt himself falling. His body crashed into the table and fell to the floor.
Then everything went black.
Forever.
Read more. Go to Mystery and Thrillers.
Chips
Tim Dolan came out the door of the Sheep’s Head Tap, turned right, and walked down West Fourth Street. It was one of those mild spring evenings that convinces even the most skeptical Midwesterner that winter is finally over. The smell of plowed earth blew in from the west, the breeze tousling Dolan’s sandy hair. A young woman came down the sidewalk, pushing a stroller in which a baby was happily chewing his fist.
Dolan was a tall, slender man with long legs and a graceful stride. A walk always made him feel good, and tonight he felt pretty good already. He had consumed just enough Harp Lager to make him pleasantly drunk, but not enough to cause a hangover the next morning. Long experience at the Sheep’s Head had taught him how to avoid the ordeal of going to work with a hangover. He walked down Fourth Street, past Lafayette Square, to a block of row houses. When he reached the second house, he turned and climbed the worn limestone steps.
The door was unlocked. Dolan walked inside and closed it behind him. A dim ceiling light burned in the entryway. Straight ahead on the left, carpeted stairs and a walnut banister led up to the second floor. To the right, French doors led to the living room. Dolan hummed a popular tune as he opened the door and walked in.
Along the opposite wall, a floor lamp burned beside an oak table. Dolan stopped just inside the door. Something was wrong here. He started to walk over to the table, then saw something in his periphery, something coming toward him. Fast.
Suddenly on guard, he turned in that direction, but too late. The beer had slowed his reaction time. A heavy object struck his head with terrible force. He raised his hands to protect himself while struggling to stay on his feet. The object hit him again, even harder this time. He staggered to one side and felt himself falling. His body crashed into the table and fell to the floor.
Then everything went black.
Forever.
Read more. Go to Mystery and Thrillers.
Saturday, December 23, 2006
Amazon Shorts
Amazon.com sells Amazon Shorts online for 49 cents each. Numerous categories are available, including entertainment, sports, travel, humor, fiction, mysteries, and others. To see a complete list, go to Amazon.com and do a search for “Amazon Shorts.” Every time a reader buys an Amazon Short, the writer’s account receives credit for 40 percent of the sale (19.6 cents). The money you make depends entirely on how many readers buy your piece. But before that, you have to submit your story or article and the editorial staff decides whether to accept or reject it. The length of each piece ranges from 2000 to 10,000 words.
I’ve submitted three short stories, and the editors have accepted all three. It helps if you have a book or books sold through Amazon.com. Your storys or essays advertize your books, which are listed below your photograph and the summary you provide to convince the reader to buy your short piece. As an example, click on “Mystery & Thrillers” and scroll down to The Plot and/or Chips. Click on the icon, and my mug shot and the introductory material I provided will leap off the screen. If you decide to buy the story, it remains yours forever. You can read it online, print it out, or download it to your computer (and I’ll make 19.6 cents; thank you). If you don't like mysteries, you'll find a comic short story with Minutes.
The Amazon Shorts program is still young, and I wouldn’t want to predict anything about it. But I think that for both readers and writers, it’s worth taking a look.
I’ve submitted three short stories, and the editors have accepted all three. It helps if you have a book or books sold through Amazon.com. Your storys or essays advertize your books, which are listed below your photograph and the summary you provide to convince the reader to buy your short piece. As an example, click on “Mystery & Thrillers” and scroll down to The Plot and/or Chips. Click on the icon, and my mug shot and the introductory material I provided will leap off the screen. If you decide to buy the story, it remains yours forever. You can read it online, print it out, or download it to your computer (and I’ll make 19.6 cents; thank you). If you don't like mysteries, you'll find a comic short story with Minutes.
The Amazon Shorts program is still young, and I wouldn’t want to predict anything about it. But I think that for both readers and writers, it’s worth taking a look.
Thursday, December 21, 2006
Earn an Online Ph.D.
If you don’t happen to live near a university, but you need to earn an advanced degree in order to help you reach your career goals, you may wish to consider an online phd. Capella University offers online graduate-degree programs in business, information technology, education, human services, and psychology.
At Capella University, you will obtain both theoretical and practical knowledge, along with the leadership skills your job requires. With this background, you’ll be in a position to make the most of your chosen profession. If you’ve already earned graduate credit elsewhere, you may be eligible to transfer up to 48 credits.
Capella University presently serves 16,000 students throughout the United States and in 63 foreign countries. It accredited by the Higher Learning Commission and is a member of the North Central Association of Colleges and Schools. To learn more about Capella’s online courses and degree programs, logon to its website and download the Capella University Catalog.
At Capella University, you will obtain both theoretical and practical knowledge, along with the leadership skills your job requires. With this background, you’ll be in a position to make the most of your chosen profession. If you’ve already earned graduate credit elsewhere, you may be eligible to transfer up to 48 credits.
Capella University presently serves 16,000 students throughout the United States and in 63 foreign countries. It accredited by the Higher Learning Commission and is a member of the North Central Association of Colleges and Schools. To learn more about Capella’s online courses and degree programs, logon to its website and download the Capella University Catalog.
The Killers
The jacket for this VHS bravely says, "Ernest Hemingway's 'The Killers.'" But the only resemblance between this movie and Hemingway's short story is that they have the same title. Earnest wrote the short story. Anthony Veiller wrote the movie. The film stars Burt Lancaster, Edmond O'Brien, and Ava Gardner.
This movie is a prime example of film noir. You can order it from Patrick's Film Noir Store. For your continued health and happiness, avoid the 1964 remake.
This movie is a prime example of film noir. You can order it from Patrick's Film Noir Store. For your continued health and happiness, avoid the 1964 remake.
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Touch of Evil
A remarable use of light and shadow, directed by Orson Welles, America's certified king of movie making. Most of the action occurs at night, the perfect time of day for all the characteristics of film noir. In our greatest movies, nothing is ever simple. This film is set along the U.S.-Mexican border. A touch of evil waits around every corner.
You can buy this movie at Patrick's Film Noir Store. Click on the link in the right sidebar.
You can buy this movie at Patrick's Film Noir Store. Click on the link in the right sidebar.
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Send Flowers
Men often give flowers to the women they love. This act provides a special show of affection. They give flower for birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, and to apologize for their stupid blunders. It doesn’t require a great imagination to think of appropriate times to send flowers.
I don’t know where or when this tradition began, but what man can resist sending a gift basket of beautiful flowers, especially when he can order it so easily from Dot Flowers? Just go online, and you’ll see what I mean. If you don’t know exactly what you want, the people at Dot Flowers have great flower gift ideas. And they’ll get the flowers sent quickly to anyone in the United States.
But I must say one more thing about a gift of flowers. We live in an era of increasing gender equality. And where is it written that a woman can’t send flowers to her special man? We men may be boneheads, but give us a little encouragement. We’re not as smart as women, but we try hard. Sometimes.
So come on someone. Send me some flowers.
I don’t know where or when this tradition began, but what man can resist sending a gift basket of beautiful flowers, especially when he can order it so easily from Dot Flowers? Just go online, and you’ll see what I mean. If you don’t know exactly what you want, the people at Dot Flowers have great flower gift ideas. And they’ll get the flowers sent quickly to anyone in the United States.
But I must say one more thing about a gift of flowers. We live in an era of increasing gender equality. And where is it written that a woman can’t send flowers to her special man? We men may be boneheads, but give us a little encouragement. We’re not as smart as women, but we try hard. Sometimes.
So come on someone. Send me some flowers.
Window Blinds for the Inept Male
Whenever I move to a new address–house, condo, or apartment–I never know how to dress the windows. I have no skill for interior decorating. When this skill is required, I’m a total failure.
If the previous residents have left blinds on the windows, I always leave them exactly as they are. If they’re ugly, dirty, or poorly installed, I take no notice. As long as they let the light in or keep it out, that’s all I ask. In the morning I get dressed and open the blinds. At night, I reverse that process. These are my only two skills with window blinds.
If the previous residents have left the windows naked, giving me no civilized way to change clothes or dry off after a shower, I go into panic mode. Fortunately, help is available online at http://www.guaranteedblinds.com/.
GUARANTEEDblinds.com offers a wide variety of window blinds and shades at http://www.guaranteedblinds.com/page/products/. In fact, this company has too many options for a guy like me who has only a vague understanding of cellular shades, pleated shades, sliding panels, and many others choices.
But GUARANTEEDblinds.com has provided help for the inept male such as me. I click on the name of any kind of shades or blinds I care to, and a page appears that contains photographs and printed material that show and tell you everything you need to know about the color, appearance, and cost of every option that interests you.
Now your inept narrator enters dangerous territory. My eye-hand coordination is somewhat less than that of a turtle. Once again, GUARANTEEDblinds.com comes to my aid. I click on http://www.guaranteedblinds.com/page/measuring/, where I learn everything I need to know about measuring the windows for the required blinds or shades I’ve chosen.
Finally, with trembling hands, I contemplate installing my new blinds. I click on http://www.guaranteedblinds.com/page/installation/, where I learn that I can follow illustrated directions for every variety of blinds or shades sold by GUARANTEEDblinds.com.
And if I try and fail, I can always call my friend Howard. He’s a carpenter. What are friends for?
If the previous residents have left blinds on the windows, I always leave them exactly as they are. If they’re ugly, dirty, or poorly installed, I take no notice. As long as they let the light in or keep it out, that’s all I ask. In the morning I get dressed and open the blinds. At night, I reverse that process. These are my only two skills with window blinds.
If the previous residents have left the windows naked, giving me no civilized way to change clothes or dry off after a shower, I go into panic mode. Fortunately, help is available online at http://www.guaranteedblinds.com/.
GUARANTEEDblinds.com offers a wide variety of window blinds and shades at http://www.guaranteedblinds.com/page/products/. In fact, this company has too many options for a guy like me who has only a vague understanding of cellular shades, pleated shades, sliding panels, and many others choices.
But GUARANTEEDblinds.com has provided help for the inept male such as me. I click on the name of any kind of shades or blinds I care to, and a page appears that contains photographs and printed material that show and tell you everything you need to know about the color, appearance, and cost of every option that interests you.
Now your inept narrator enters dangerous territory. My eye-hand coordination is somewhat less than that of a turtle. Once again, GUARANTEEDblinds.com comes to my aid. I click on http://www.guaranteedblinds.com/page/measuring/, where I learn everything I need to know about measuring the windows for the required blinds or shades I’ve chosen.
Finally, with trembling hands, I contemplate installing my new blinds. I click on http://www.guaranteedblinds.com/page/installation/, where I learn that I can follow illustrated directions for every variety of blinds or shades sold by GUARANTEEDblinds.com.
And if I try and fail, I can always call my friend Howard. He’s a carpenter. What are friends for?
The Joy of Literature
What happens after you get your first book or two published? Do baskets of cash begin arriving at your door? Do gorgeous movie stars invite you to stop by at 10:00 PM and not to forget your toothbrush? Do the leaders of powerful countries ask you what to do about the problems of the world? Maybe famous writers get piles of cash and buses of literary groupies, but most writers aren’t famous and never will be.
If you want to get rich and famous, don’t become a writer. Become a doctor, lawyer, or faith healer. Go into politics, where bribes are more common than books. If you just want to see your name in print, look it up in the phone book. Only a tiny percentage of my fellow countrymen read books, and most of them want to see the first page filled with sex and violence, and they want graphic details if you don’t mind.
In the entire United States, the number of people who want to read anything literary could be seated comfortably in the restrooms at the bus depot in Omaha. If you insist on living in a garret and perfecting your masterpiece, I hope you don’t snore. I got here first.
If you want to get rich and famous, don’t become a writer. Become a doctor, lawyer, or faith healer. Go into politics, where bribes are more common than books. If you just want to see your name in print, look it up in the phone book. Only a tiny percentage of my fellow countrymen read books, and most of them want to see the first page filled with sex and violence, and they want graphic details if you don’t mind.
In the entire United States, the number of people who want to read anything literary could be seated comfortably in the restrooms at the bus depot in Omaha. If you insist on living in a garret and perfecting your masterpiece, I hope you don’t snore. I got here first.
Monday, December 18, 2006
Advantage Processors
Any business needs the help of a company that can process its credit-card payments. Advantage Processors (http://www.advantageprocessors.com/) is one of the many firms eager to process credit-card payments for traditional or online merchants.
Advantage Processors provides its services to both low-risk and high-risk merchants. Low-risk customers include firms such as retail stores, hotels, and restaurants. High-risk operations include firms such as travel businesses, legal gaming companies, and merchants that previously lost their credit-card processors.
If I were a merchant in search of someone to process credit-card payments for me, I’d think more highly of Advantage Processors if it didn’t misspell “risk” as “Rrisk” on the first page of its Web site. But we copyeditors tend to be excessively fastidious, and I couldn’t buy or run a hotdog cart.
In any event, Advantage explains its services without any misspellings on the second page of its Web site. Interested merchants can read all this by going to http://www.advantageprocessors.com/processor_services.php.
If you don’t care to open your own hotdog cart, but you’d like to find a job, Advantage Processors “is always looking for bright energetic sales persons.” I’m not feeling all that bright and energetic at the moment, but someone a little younger might want to check out the possibilities at http://www.advantageprocessors.com/careers.php. If you like what you see, go for it. And the next time I can’t understand my credit-card bill, perhaps you won’t mind if I give you a call.
Advantage Processors provides its services to both low-risk and high-risk merchants. Low-risk customers include firms such as retail stores, hotels, and restaurants. High-risk operations include firms such as travel businesses, legal gaming companies, and merchants that previously lost their credit-card processors.
If I were a merchant in search of someone to process credit-card payments for me, I’d think more highly of Advantage Processors if it didn’t misspell “risk” as “Rrisk” on the first page of its Web site. But we copyeditors tend to be excessively fastidious, and I couldn’t buy or run a hotdog cart.
In any event, Advantage explains its services without any misspellings on the second page of its Web site. Interested merchants can read all this by going to http://www.advantageprocessors.com/processor_services.php.
If you don’t care to open your own hotdog cart, but you’d like to find a job, Advantage Processors “is always looking for bright energetic sales persons.” I’m not feeling all that bright and energetic at the moment, but someone a little younger might want to check out the possibilities at http://www.advantageprocessors.com/careers.php. If you like what you see, go for it. And the next time I can’t understand my credit-card bill, perhaps you won’t mind if I give you a call.
Five Dollars
I got out of the car and walked into the store. I like to shop late Sunday night when the rest of the town is asleep. No crashing into carts. No long lines at the check-out counters. I walked through the warm spring air into the all-night supermarket.
I collected the few things I needed and pushed my cart up to where a young man stood ahead of me. Beyond the cash register, two other men were clowning around. These two men were talking about five dollars. I paid no attention to the details. It was a pleasant spring night. People felt like clowning around.
One of the men was about forty. He looked stocky, not too heavy, but well built and strong. The other man was twenty at best. Slender, average height, quick and agile, a good-looking kid. He carried a bag of groceries in his left hand. A pretty young woman stood there waiting for him.
Then the younger of the two men suddenly threw out his right fist, putting all his weight into a blow that Sugar Ray Robinson would have laughed at. But the older man didn’t laugh. The amateur roundhouse caught him in the mouth and blood soon spotted his T-shirt. I pulled out my cell phone as a manager shouted, “None of that in here. That stops right now.”
The young man and his companion turned and ran out the door. The other man, despite the fact that blood continued to fall on his shirt, was still talking about the five dollars. “I didn’t steal anything,” he said repeatedly. “I have my own money.”
A policewoman arrived within sixty seconds. She hadn’t used her siren. “Let me look at that mouth,” she said to the injured man. “We’ll worry about the five dollars later.” The microphone attached to her lapel picked up every word for the dispatcher. “One ambulance,” the policewoman said as the man continued to talk about the five dollars.
One of the women who worked for the store gave the man a clean towel to put on his mouth as he continued to say, “I have my own money. I didn’t take any five dollars from anyone.”
The man in front of me paid for his groceries. Commerce stops for nothing. He stood there tentatively, probably wondering what to do next. I paid for my groceries, and we finally walked out together.
“I didn’t see any reason for that young fellow to hit that man,” I said. “I don’t know what the trouble was, but he didn’t need to hit him.”
“Oh, you know how these kids are these days,” he said. “He lives in the same apartment building I do. I talked to him earlier today, and he was just fine. The police will know who he was.”
He started to walk toward the apartment building beyond the store as I unlocked the door of my white Toyota. “Be careful,” I said.
“I’ll be okay,” he said.
I got into the car and locked the door. In the distance, the sound of an ambulance siren was coming my way.
I looked at the clock on the dash. It was almost 12:30 AM. The next morning, I would drive down to southern Iowa. I would put flowers on the graves of my parents and grandparents. I’d remember how hard their lives had been. At 12:30 AM, it was already Memorial Day, 2006.
I started the car and drove slowly home.
I collected the few things I needed and pushed my cart up to where a young man stood ahead of me. Beyond the cash register, two other men were clowning around. These two men were talking about five dollars. I paid no attention to the details. It was a pleasant spring night. People felt like clowning around.
One of the men was about forty. He looked stocky, not too heavy, but well built and strong. The other man was twenty at best. Slender, average height, quick and agile, a good-looking kid. He carried a bag of groceries in his left hand. A pretty young woman stood there waiting for him.
Then the younger of the two men suddenly threw out his right fist, putting all his weight into a blow that Sugar Ray Robinson would have laughed at. But the older man didn’t laugh. The amateur roundhouse caught him in the mouth and blood soon spotted his T-shirt. I pulled out my cell phone as a manager shouted, “None of that in here. That stops right now.”
The young man and his companion turned and ran out the door. The other man, despite the fact that blood continued to fall on his shirt, was still talking about the five dollars. “I didn’t steal anything,” he said repeatedly. “I have my own money.”
A policewoman arrived within sixty seconds. She hadn’t used her siren. “Let me look at that mouth,” she said to the injured man. “We’ll worry about the five dollars later.” The microphone attached to her lapel picked up every word for the dispatcher. “One ambulance,” the policewoman said as the man continued to talk about the five dollars.
One of the women who worked for the store gave the man a clean towel to put on his mouth as he continued to say, “I have my own money. I didn’t take any five dollars from anyone.”
The man in front of me paid for his groceries. Commerce stops for nothing. He stood there tentatively, probably wondering what to do next. I paid for my groceries, and we finally walked out together.
“I didn’t see any reason for that young fellow to hit that man,” I said. “I don’t know what the trouble was, but he didn’t need to hit him.”
“Oh, you know how these kids are these days,” he said. “He lives in the same apartment building I do. I talked to him earlier today, and he was just fine. The police will know who he was.”
He started to walk toward the apartment building beyond the store as I unlocked the door of my white Toyota. “Be careful,” I said.
“I’ll be okay,” he said.
I got into the car and locked the door. In the distance, the sound of an ambulance siren was coming my way.
I looked at the clock on the dash. It was almost 12:30 AM. The next morning, I would drive down to southern Iowa. I would put flowers on the graves of my parents and grandparents. I’d remember how hard their lives had been. At 12:30 AM, it was already Memorial Day, 2006.
I started the car and drove slowly home.
Diamonds
Ever been married? Who hasn’t? Ultimately, my marriage didn’t work out, I have two children who sparkle like diamonds. If I could have afforded it at the time, their mother would have had a diamond engagement ring that sparkled like her two children later did.
As it happens, had I known of Abazias engagement rings, http://www.abazias.com/, their mother could have had such a ring, for Abazias specializes inexpesive loose diamonds, as shown at http://www.abazias.com/splash_diamonds.asp. This allows you to design your own engagement ring.
I’m not claiming that a diamond engagement ring from Abazias would have saved my marriage, but it wouldn’t have done any harm. My children are now adults, and I am happily single.I’m not the innocent young man who married so many years ago.
And as it happens, I have a special friend that I want to spend the rest of my life with. I don’t have to buy her an expensive ring to prove anything to her, but maybe this time I should look at a cheap diamond at http://www.abazias.com/couplesdiamond/couples_diamond.asp.
As it happens, had I known of Abazias engagement rings, http://www.abazias.com/, their mother could have had such a ring, for Abazias specializes inexpesive loose diamonds, as shown at http://www.abazias.com/splash_diamonds.asp. This allows you to design your own engagement ring.
I’m not claiming that a diamond engagement ring from Abazias would have saved my marriage, but it wouldn’t have done any harm. My children are now adults, and I am happily single.I’m not the innocent young man who married so many years ago.
And as it happens, I have a special friend that I want to spend the rest of my life with. I don’t have to buy her an expensive ring to prove anything to her, but maybe this time I should look at a cheap diamond at http://www.abazias.com/couplesdiamond/couples_diamond.asp.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
Car Trouble
Have you ever found yourself in need of money when payday seemed like a century away? I have. Something is always going wrong with my car, but I get paid at the first of every month and the car gets sick in the middle of the month. One solution to this frequent problem is to go to National Payday online at http://www.nationalpayday.com/. That’s where you can obtain a loan that will help cover your expenses until payday.
National Payday gives first-time customers a cash advance of up to $300 without a credit check. Returning customers can request even more. (My car always needs more.) Go to http://www.nationalpayday.com/faq.htm
for more information, or go straight to https://www.nationalpayday.com/nat/new_app/app_step_1.asp
to apply.
Now please excuse me. I must try to start my car.
National Payday gives first-time customers a cash advance of up to $300 without a credit check. Returning customers can request even more. (My car always needs more.) Go to http://www.nationalpayday.com/faq.htm
for more information, or go straight to https://www.nationalpayday.com/nat/new_app/app_step_1.asp
to apply.
Now please excuse me. I must try to start my car.
Gold
For thousands of years, people have conserved their wealth by converting it to gold. The ancient Egyptians, for example, were among the first to mint gold coins. More recently, the United States backed its currency for over a hundred years with the equivalent amount of gold held in reserve. The United States remained on the gold standard until the 1930’s.In the present era, the Monex Deposit Company makes gold available for purchase by the general public. You may purchase gold in either coins or ingots. Monex will deliver the gold to whatever independent bank or depository you prefer. Monex also provides other precious metals and will deliver them as safely as with gold.No one would suggest that you put all your wealth into gold, but consider purchasing this rare and beautiful metal as a safeguard for whatever amount of your accumulated wealth you wish. In unpredictable economic times, gold is one of the only sure guardians of your wealth.
The Demise of Film Noir
Prior to the widespread availability of television, American men and women read short stories or novels for entertainment. Dashiell Hammett, the inventor of the hard-boiled detective story, made his living at times by writing short stories for the many mystery magazines available. He also wrote five novels. Hammett began his career by stating that he was going to take crime away from the upper classes of Agatha Christie’s novels and give it back to the common people, who were really good at it. Raymond Chandler acknowledged his debt to Hammett and went on to elevate the mystery story to the level of literature.
With all this popular fiction lying about, it didn’t take movie makers long to see that mystery stories could be turned into popular movies. In this fashion, film noir was born. The novels of Hammett, Chandler, and many others were adapted for the screen.
Then television happened. Television shows require no literacy, intelligence, or effort from the audience. Readers of mysteries, mostly men, stopped reading and started watching television. TV cop shows of no artistic merit led to the death of film noir. The wise-guy detective gave way to movies about cops who shot first and never asked questions. Compare The Big Sleep with any police movie of the present era, and you can’t fail to see the superiority of Chandler’s Phil Marlowe as adapted for the screen.
Film noir died from multiple wounds.
With all this popular fiction lying about, it didn’t take movie makers long to see that mystery stories could be turned into popular movies. In this fashion, film noir was born. The novels of Hammett, Chandler, and many others were adapted for the screen.
Then television happened. Television shows require no literacy, intelligence, or effort from the audience. Readers of mysteries, mostly men, stopped reading and started watching television. TV cop shows of no artistic merit led to the death of film noir. The wise-guy detective gave way to movies about cops who shot first and never asked questions. Compare The Big Sleep with any police movie of the present era, and you can’t fail to see the superiority of Chandler’s Phil Marlowe as adapted for the screen.
Film noir died from multiple wounds.
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Heart Rate Monitors
Having reached the age when the condition of my heart is a matter of concern for me (and my doctor), I go out five days a week and huff and puff my way along the sidewalks of my neighborhood for thirty minutes. After ten or fifteen minutes, I stop to check my pulse, which should be elevated to at least 100 beats per minute. According to my doctor, this regimen will lower my blood pressure, lower my pulse rate when not huffing and puffing, and keep me alive long enough to collect my fair share of my retirement annuity.
All this is just fine. I check my pulse while exercising, but what is that pulse the rest of the day? I don’t know. I never remember to check. How do I know if all this exercise is doing any good? I don’t know. I need some accurate way to check my pulse when exercising and when not. I need to know about Heart Rate Monitors.
At this point, EverthingFitness.com enters this heroic narrative. Like many Americans, I’m a gadget freak. If you want to give another gadget freak a Christmas present that will help improve his or her health, consider a heart rate monitor from EverythingFitness.com. Strapped and strapless monitors are available from a variety of suppliers. If you’re seeking a gift for a biker, rock climber, or an old huffer and puffer like me, you’ll find what you need at EverythingFitness.com.
I intend to draw the attention of my children to this matter. You must have at least one friend or relative whose health would benefit from a heart rate monitor.
All this is just fine. I check my pulse while exercising, but what is that pulse the rest of the day? I don’t know. I never remember to check. How do I know if all this exercise is doing any good? I don’t know. I need some accurate way to check my pulse when exercising and when not. I need to know about Heart Rate Monitors.
At this point, EverthingFitness.com enters this heroic narrative. Like many Americans, I’m a gadget freak. If you want to give another gadget freak a Christmas present that will help improve his or her health, consider a heart rate monitor from EverythingFitness.com. Strapped and strapless monitors are available from a variety of suppliers. If you’re seeking a gift for a biker, rock climber, or an old huffer and puffer like me, you’ll find what you need at EverythingFitness.com.
I intend to draw the attention of my children to this matter. You must have at least one friend or relative whose health would benefit from a heart rate monitor.
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